In hopes of being likeable, we give too much of ourselves.
Perhaps you don’t feel that way, but, you’re being a doormat personality somehow. There are signs to confirm that.
Most people walk over you whenever they want. And, it’s you who let them do it over and over again.
Being nice and making others happy is not a problem. It’s ‘losing yourself’ in the process.
The fact is, no one wanted to treat you like a doormat earlier.
But your low self-worth and keeping everyone happy with you, encourages others to use you.
14 Signs You Are Being A Doormat
Ever found that people aren’t taking you seriously, but often belittle you, manipulate you and play with your feelings?
Watch out, if your behavior displays these signs of doormat personality.
And, this is the first step to avoid being treated like a doormat, whether in a relationship, workplace or in any connection.
1. You started to hate yourself for giving too much of yourself.
So far, you’ve been very supportive and nice to others. Maybe you’re now, still.
But, slowly with their behavior, you came to know how others treat you.
You realize that you’re not valued or respected for what you do for them. This makes you lessen your nice nature and stop doing any favor to others.
But, people are smart manipulators. So, you end up being a doormat, again.
2. You’re simply the ‘YES man’ to everyone.
Do you often find yourself doing something for others, which you don’t want to do?
You want to say no to your boss for working extra hours or weekends. But you can’t.
Sometimes the same goes for your colleagues, too.
Don’t think that they’re persuasive. It’s you’re a doormat person at the workplace.
3. You never express your true self or opinion, as it is.
You’re just not confident enough to stand up for yourself. ‘Being you’ is uncomfortable to you.
During some conversation or planning, you simply agree with others. Of course, you have your thoughts to share.
But, you don’t want to look different than others.
If you agree with others, only to please everyone, it shows your doormat behavior.
4. You want to prove something to others.
This is one of the common things found in the doormat personalities.
When you care more about what others think of you and how they see you… and they know it, you are often being used.
They know how to pressurize you.
And, they get things done from you, as if doing you a favor.
5. You’re not getting what you give to others, every time.
No respect. No appreciation. No care. No time. You get nothing from others.
Others have no concern about your needs.
Nor do they ask for your suggestions, because they know you’re ready for anything.
Even people stopped saying thank you.
Because they’re not comfortable saying this to you – a doormat.
Check other: Signs Of A Quirky Person
6. You know how people treat you, still don’t oppose.
The low self-confidence in you is also the biggest problem why you’re treated so badly.
You look for the validation of others.
When you strive to be perfect in others’ eyes, you are unattractive in your eyes.
Along with being nice, you should stand up for yourself, sometimes.
But, you’re continuing to be nice, which makes them take more and more from you.
7. You have higher expectations from others.
Well, you behave nice to others… because you want the same treatment.
By helping them all the time and behaving in a certain way, you also hope they do the same to you.
But, they are not and never.
Having expectations from others to say nice to you or do only good for you, because you’re not doing anything wrong to them… is not possible.
Not everyone is that kind-hearted like you. So, stop being a doormat, anymore.
8. You’re the one they look up to when nobody else is there.
To you, it’s like a lovely relationship, but it’s not. You’re just an option for them.
It happens sometimes that you give too much into it.
But you’re not getting the same efforts back. Not even feelings and respect, too.
If that happens, these are signs that you’re a doormat in a relationship, in which you never be loved for who you’re but for what you give.
9. But, you’re ignored and avoided when they have someone else.
Indeed, you mean nothing to them. You’re not anyone’s priority, but an option.
In friendship or professional connection, you might experience that you’re not involved in everything.
But, when someone has nothing to do or no one is there with them, they come to you.
And when they have others again, you’re completely ignored, as if they don’t know you.
11. You’re rejected quite often for being too nice or cute.
When they’ve nothing else to take from you, you see they leave you with silly excuses.
There could be many reasons why they suddenly want to leave you.
Maybe their tastes have changed, they had enough of you or he/she sees you as FWB only.
It’s a clear sign that you’re in a doormat relationship, when they want to leave you, even after being close for so long.
12. You see you’re so reliant on others.
From getting their help to making you feel confident and happy, you need others.
You simply have no confidence to get things done on your own, without others’ help.
When you depend on others, you can’t live your life, your way.
Being a doormat person, you do what they say but don’t care about your personal views.
12. You’re being used, disrespected, and manipulated badly.
This will happen, when you give too much to the wrong person.
If you have a friendship or relationship with a self-centered person, they will make you feel miserable anyway.
Because you’ve no respect for you, it allows them to treat you however they wish.
You’ve been so nice to give always without caring whether others do the same or not, these are signs that you’re a doormat personality, for sure.
13. You’re an easy target all the time.
Not everyone is going to use you, some keep you as a scapegoat.
Whether you’re involved in something or not, your doormat nature makes you an easy target. Especially for the manipulators and lazy people.
Your boss or colleague never gives you credit, only blames and excuses you, anyway.
That means you’re treated as a doormat at your workplace.
14. You’re a volunteer for everyone you know.
Maybe you want to leave some impression on others and try to show your contribution.
As a result, you are always busy doing more for others than for yourself.
People often take advantage of you and trick you to get something done for free.
It’s like, you’re available for everyone, anytime they want. For anything. For Free, of course.
Check other: Signs Someone Have No Trust In You
When You Know You’re Being A Doormat…
So far, observing yourself in similar situations above, indicates that you’re a doormat personality.
And that’s how your friends, date, or someone from the workplace sees you.
These signs tell you to stand for yourself. And regain your self-respect.
Looking for some quick tips on how to stop being a doormat, then here’s what you can do.
- Have your priorities and boundaries set. Make sure others know about it.
- Start to express your opinions and thoughts as they are.
- No need to strive for the perfect, nobody is perfect. Not you, nor they.
- Stand up for yourself, because no one will be doing that.
- Never do anything just to impress others when you’re uncomfortable with it.
- Say no when you want to say it, without any hesitation. It’s for you.
- Don’t think that you’re not worthy enough. Just need to be with the right people.
- Be kind. Be nice to others. But never let anyone use you, anymore.
- No need to feel ashamed of being different and stand apart in the group.
- Keep your needs and expectations clear with others. Let them know you have one.
- Caring for yourself, you’re not selfish. But you know your self-worth.
If you’ve been a doormat personality for a long time and others have been taking advantage of you, it certainly won’t be easy for you (Before them) to handle this new version of yourself.
But, this is a must to keep your self-respect protected.
There’s no point in being nice to others, who only use you and have no respect for you.
Be nice. But, avoid being doormat for anyone!